Today I had to go and talk to students at the local school about my job, and the skills needed to do it. Never one to prepare properly for anything, I ran up a list early this morning and was surprised to find that, apparently, I am some sort of high ranking job Goddess.Not only do I possess the skills of diplomacy, organisation, IT, accounting and empathy but I also know all the words to Bob the Builder and can change a nappy in under a minute. Add to this, the cookery, cleaning, bike- building and toaster-fixing skills I have and, well, look, I am obviously some kind of genius.
I rattled off the list to the disinterested mob of students and then added on the extra hours I put in every week at home, in order to keep house, and family, running on a full tank.
"What do you do in your spare time" asked the only student who was awake.
"Oh yes, forgot that." I said "I write books as well but I think I need a hobby that allows me let off steam."
Now, where's the gun, I need to shoot something.
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pee ess
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12 comments:
Send me the gun when you're finished, will you? I've just spent the morning fixing my MG template so it was readable in the new, 'improved' Internet Explorer 7, henceforth known the Internet Earworm.
We always knew you were wonderful and this just proofs it -- try Mozilla Firefoz 2 Mr lee!
Lee, when the Bard of Bridport suggests a browser, take his advice, man--don't be a sap.
Minx, you've told us what you do, but you didn't tell us how. The usual female competence aside, it's a wonder you have time to--well it's a wonder you have time.
Uh, people, I use 4 browsers! I have to keep tabs on how my stuff looks to my readers.
No offense, Lee. I just hope you normally keep IE chained in the basement under several old rugs, where it belongs. That's where mine is, but I can still hear it down there muttering "Le web, c'est moi!" all night.
But your morning wasn't a total waste. Between the one wakeful student and all the flies, you really did a lot. Well done! And I haven't mentioned the bacteria and the amoeba and all the other micro organisms.
John, that is an excellent suggestion. I've been too lenient and let IE have the run of the place. Does anyone have a good fishing Net to catch it?
Aghhh, I am overrun by earworms and fireflops. Get this heretical technical speak out of here now, or I shall be forced to take a pot shot!
Is fireflaps that cute little foxy one? I might have me one of those....
The picture and the post made me laugh out loud!
My God, that was refreshing!
And who the HELL is this "Try the Mozilla Firefox 2? I'm getting really tired of rejecting all of the come on spam!
Fireflaps? Cute and Foxy? I almost reverted to my patented aol term of LOL! (Laughing out Loud)
I think there are laws, but could you possibly mail me your gun after you are done with it? I sure could use it.
I hope the FBI isn't reading this.
It's a JOKE!
It's a JOKE!
HONEST FELLAS!
I was being cynical!
LOOK IT UP!
I bow to you, my Goddess!
And so you should, Sam, I am a timetabled semi-demi-gun-toting icon of tight schedules.
And no, Roberta, you can't have me gun. You're American, get your own and then you can take shots at Fwirefwops, Blugger, Goggle, or any other internet service that is interfering in your smooth running day.
Multi-talented, multi-faceted... I bow down in awe!
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