Thursday, September 14, 2006

'An if ye harm none, do what ye will'

* * *

In the bluestone caverns, deep under Masterbridge, someone was taking notice.
It had been a long time since there was anything to notice, anything at all, but there was, imperceptibly, something there.

A further investigation would be needed, of course, there was no need to get overexcited at this early stage. Those above would know about it all in good time and there was plenty of that down here, an abundance of it going forward and coming back, but that was another issue.

In the here and now, the monotony had been rudely interrupted and only time would tell if it were to remain broken, or continue on as it had done for the last fifty years.

The yellow ridged fingernail reached out to swirl the inky, black water. With a sprinkle of chosen herbs the scene burst into life once again. The shrouded face watched intently as the picture cleared, expanded, shuddered and then settled down to admit the truth.....yes, she was coming.


* * *
This is a small, opening taster of my novel Coven of One. I am publishing through Skintwriters company Opening Chapter. I would appreciate you comments.

18 comments:

skint writer said...

wonderfully intriguing minx

roll on :)

Minx said...

It's alright for you to say Skint, you have read the whole thing. I want to know what everyone else thinks - are they intrigued, or bored out of their minds!

Does 'she' have hook?

This piece is not part of the book, but could it be used, blurb etc? What questions does it raise in the readers mind?

Atyllah said...

Ooh! Wow! Yes, please, ma'am, more!
Yes, good hook. Yes, I'm intrigued and I want to read more.
I want to know who is coming, I want to know how is stirring the water and watching and I want to know what's going to happen!
And yes, this would make an excellent blurb - though for backcover blurb, you might need shorten it a tad. But that would depend on your cover layout etc.

Lee said...

Intriguing.I want to read more.

Small point: 'inky' suffices.

Marie said...

Makes me want to read more too. I agree with Atyllah about cutting it a little for the blurb though.

Good luck with it Minx.

Sharon J said...

So who's "she" then? Oh... right, that's what we're supposed to be wondering about. Gottcha! It worked.

Minx said...

See what you mean, thanks Lee! And everyone.....

Debi said...

Great! I've been waiting for this ...

As a blurb would suggest using just 1st and last paras? Keeps it tight, draws us in and gives (I suspect) good taster of content/style etc.

Maxine said...

I was going to say "intriguing" until I saw that everyone else has too.
(Late to the party as my hard disk has died so I am borrowing Jenny's computer.)

It makes me want to know more, for sure.

Pundy said...

That last paragraph is very, very good.

Minx said...

Hey Pund, nice to have you back!

Right, five of you mentioned 'intriguing' so I'll take that as a good.

'Inky' suffices.

First and last paras are the hooks then?

Still up for any other suggestions/thoughts but will have a fiddle about.

chiefbiscuit said...

Accomplished writing - and yes you have whetted my appetitie - stirred my curiosity ...

Anonymous said...

okay, so do we get more than just a starter. A bit of 'main course' maybe. I wish you all the success with the book. And yes, I will be buying a copy.

Saaleha said...

and the anonymous is Saaleha, but I'm lazy to have to type that in every time I comment. Damned Beta Blogger!!

Minx said...

I will offer up more tidbits at time goes on -patience Saaleha. Sorry about Beta, you're next, it's coming....

Amin said...

It's certainly whetted my appetite and why isn't it going to be in the book? It's too good to waste, surely?

I want to know more so I guess I'll have to keep coming back for the tidbits then!

Minx said...

There's a tiddly bit in the book and if it got your interest then it's not wasted.

Umm, you could buy a book if you want to know all of it. We will be taking orders when the costings have been finalised with the printers.

Cailleach said...

Me, me! Put me down for one!