Wednesday, July 25, 2007

Ten in the bed

My bedroom is important. It is my sanctuary, a place to hatch plots, to discuss matters of great importance with the Feckers, and a nest in which to escape from the world.
It has been likened to a Persian brothel and although not quite used for that purpose I would, if truth be known, like to entertain all sorts of people in my bed.
Oh, calm down, not that sort of entertaining. I'm talking about non-sexual bedmates, those that make those lists that we all make of who we would invite for dinner. However, I don't want them to come for dinner, I want them to pop into my boudoir for tea and toast and they could tell me all the answers to those important little questions I have been wanting to ask. They could also delight me with their anecdotes, poetry, chat to me about their art and ask my advice on all manner of things. Heh.

So here they are - my (nearly) non-sexual bedlist......


1. Oscar Wilde
2. Mother Teresa
3. Kevin Spacey
4. W.B Yeats
5. Judi Dench
6. Maya Angelou
7. Jack Nicholson
8. Kurt Jackson
9. Peter O'Toole
10. Mrs Doyle (Father Ted)


I also have a secret list of blogger bedmates, but I fear I would need a rather large bed!


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36 comments:

Vesper said...

Quite interesting list, Minx!
But, forgive me for asking, why the bedroom?! :-)
And do you really think anyone has all the answers?... :-)

L.M.Noonan said...

I'm probably wrong -because I'm not very good at History; but didn't many of the upper class in days gone by entertain guests in their bedrooms whilst lying in bed?
I think they got gussied up, no crumpled nighties or birthday suits. I think it's a wonderful idea, a truly retro idea that should be srinstated.

Minx said...

Vesper, why not the bedroom? It is a place where I love to be and no, no one has all the answers but it would be fun, and comfortable, finding out.

You must be right, LM. I think I have 'bed entertaining' in my blood. I would certainly get gussied up and of course Mrs Doyle could bring us some sardine and marmite sandwichs with a little cocaine in them!
(Sorry if you're not familiar with Father Ted - Mrs Doyle is the totally mad housekeeper)

mutleythedog said...

I am with you on Oscar Wilde - but wasn't he very tall? Does anyone know?

Mother Teresa would not be much fun - she would probably steal your sheets to distribute to the poor. Also she smelled slightly of onions when I met her.

Are you sure about Yeats? I would watch him carefully in case he turned dangerously poetical.

Judi Dench - OK she has been in lots of things where she is in bed so she would be right at home . Same For Jack, but who is Maya Angelou? Does she sing opera? I would not want a lady opera singer in my bed. Just an opinion.

Peter O'Toole was a terrifying drunk so would mix well with Mrs Doyle - if you thinking more than one at a time...

Jon M said...

I bet Judi Dench farts outrageously in bed and you would not be able to have a rational conversation beyond, 'there's no need to waft the sheets around too..."

Verilion said...

Mmm writing this comment from my boudoir myself. I think I could do that entertaining thingy from my bedroom, but then I would like a bigger room and I would have a mattress on the floor so that we could all lounge around and wave our legs in the air... Just ignore me.

John said...

No quibble in principle, but wouldn't ten require quite a lot of stacking?

Just a thought...

Poetess said...

I understand completely what you mean but I was trying to guess which ones were not nearly non sexual in your list of ten. Kevin Spacey maybe??

I would have to have a whole host of poets I think.

Minx said...

More than one at a time, Muts? Of course - I want the whole damn lot in there - a bed party and I would knit Oscar some bedsocks to keep his tootsies warm. Maya Angelou is a writer and poet.

Judi Dench gets a place in me bed just because she has an infectious laugh. i would put up with the farting, Jon.

Oh V, a woman who understands! And yes, 'dead ants' would be played by all.

Minx said...

Stacking, John? No, I'd spread them out a bit. There's plenty of room on top of the wardrobe's and I would imagine that Jack would need a bed to himself, although I couldn't see any prospective conquests for him on me list!

So who would you have, Poetess? Confess....

john.g. said...

Minx, you need a bigger bed! My wheelchair wont fit!

red dirt girl said...

i love my bedroom too. now that i've kicked my spouse out, i've made it my own ... it's the most peaceful place in my zoo.

interesting list - though i think Jack N. will want to have sex before thoughtful discussion ... sex with everyone on the bed ... at the same time ..

i'm not sure why i think that .... hmmm.

Nothingman said...

With mr yates in bed the second coming would take on a whole new meaning ;)

N

Minx said...

You take your wheelchair to bed, John? Anyway, you wouldn't need it - there are plenty of people about.

Then I would have to stipulate, Dirty Girl, that sex is off the menu and that intelligent conversation is The Way of the Bed. Jack may prove difficult though.

My goodness, Nothingman, I wouldn't know if I was coming, or going!

Meloney Lemon said...

It looks like you've got proper sheets and blankets. How very civilised. Oscar and the others would feel well at home ....

I have to say that the only person who might identify with my boudoir (laundry and children's old schoolwork store) .... might be Tracy Emin. Really must tidy up sometime ....

Minx said...

Oh dear, Meloney, if you hunt under all those throws you will find a very common duvet. Mr Wilde would not be pleased, but he would feel at home with me two Victorian wardrobes - that is until he opened the doors and found all the untidiness wedged in there.

Now come on you lot - who would you have in your bed for a little bit of late night talking?

John said...

It's an odd assortment, Minx. Three of them dead, and all. Though I suppose you could use them for bookends--Oscar and Willy, that is. And Mother T could sit on Jacky boy-might help keep the peace. Still, an odd lot. I'd be ready for trouble, was I you...

Minx said...

I am mistress of my own bed, John, I will have no trouble with the living, or the dead.

Use them as bookends, I think not? Anyway, I think I might just have replaced Oscar with Dara O'Briain - I'm so fickle.

John said...

Poor Oscy--ever the bridesmaid never the...whatever. Anyhow, I'm reassured.

I guess.

Verilion said...

I think I would start with Pablo Neruda reading poetry so that I could just listen to the words and get all gooey eyed. Then Neil Gaiman and or Terry Pratchett to discuss inspiration and originality and the whole fantasy thing, actually I may opt for Gaiman to find out if he was ever pissed off with the amazing similarities between a certain famous wizard and his lad in The Books of Magic. Then Julian Barnes so that I could stare in admiration at those wonderful hands that pen or type those fab words and once I'd got over that I might have thought of a few questions... I'm thinking of the rest now.

Minx said...

Well, I'm glad, John. I would hate to think that you were worried about the dead people in my bed! (don't you love conversations like this?)

And V, being a huge Pratchett/Gaiman fan do you think you could fit me in as well? I would like to ask Terry a few things about Granny Weatherwax.

Absolute Vanilla (and Atyllah) said...

And do you really think that that O'Toole fellow would settle for just tea and toast...?
As for Mrs Doyle, well there certainly wouldn't be a shortage of tea there...

Minx said...

Do you think he'd be up for a little G&T action, Vanilla?

Ah no, Mrs Doyle says he'd be wantin' a nice cup of tea, so he would. Ah go on, go on, go on, go on.....

Newmania said...

I`ve seen Judie Dench a few times its odd how she diminishes on the television on stage she is exhilarating . saw Kevin Spacey at the Almeida too. Infcat I gaher if you have any interest its posibleto celeb spot 24 hours a day around here …by celeb I mean someone who was once a vet in something or something

I think I would like to meet someone a bit less hard work than a famous achiever . Perhaps Weedon or Grossmith ( Diary of Nobody ) have you ever read it ?

Minx said...

It is weird how things work, Mr Newman, someone told me about this book a while back. Being in my usual state of one foot in the otherworld, I neglected to file this in 'things not to be forgotten'. So thanks for the nudge, I have made a note and paid attention. I think I must be meant to read it!

Poetess said...

Hi Minx

My list would compromise of

Jermome Flynn
Tony Robinson
Robert Redford
Dawn French
Sandi Toskvig
Dervla Kirwan
Charles Dickens
Jane Austin
Emily Pankhurst

Thats my list minx. but can you guess which ones are nearly not non sexual?

Wanderlust Scarlett said...

Minx,

I know exactly what you mean about its being a sanctuary; mine is as well. It's where I am at my most vulnerable, where I rest, dream, think, read, write... where I am most honest with myself.
Everything begins and ends in there.
It's where (among other favorites)my Vettriano prints hang; The Singing Butler is right over my bed.
My home is my sanctuary, but my bedroom is sacred... an inner sanctuary.
I'd have to meet some of these folks in the kitchen... for tea and meals. Break bread with them.

My list would be sort of similar (Oscar, M Teresa, Maya). I'd add Dr. Martin Luther King Jr., Khalil Gibran, Albert Einstein, Erma Bombeck, Gene Kelly, Rudyard Kipling, William Shakespeare, King Solomon, Clark Gable, Neil Armstrong, Bill Cosby, Michelangelo, Cary Grant, Benjamin Franklin, Galileo, Leonardo DaVinci, Princess Diana, Louis Armstrong and Ella Fitzgerald.
I know, it's more than 10. I have a big kitchen.

I laughed when I saw Jack on there... somehow I think he'd wind up doing more than talking if he was in your bed with you...

*giggle*

I love that you have Judi Dench on there, she's so fabulous.
What a great list.
What a great idea!


Scarlett & Viaggiatore

Absolute Vanilla (and Atyllah) said...

Ah no, go on yerself, y'bold Minx - oi think it'd be more than just a bit of tea and G&T action he'd be after now. An' don't ya think that'd be just grand... think o' those gin soaked blue eyes an' all... never mind ah no, ah no - y'know there's always an ah yes, alright now yer grand...

Minx said...

Great list, Poetess, but I wouldn't presume to try and guess who you'd get it on with (it's Tony Robinson, isn't it? - you're either heavily into digging up history, or you fancy a little turnip love).

Scarlett, your list is interesting. I wouldn't have Princess Diana - think of the entourage - they'd eat all your biscuits.

Hmm, maybe a mistake having Nicholson and O'Toole in the same bed - who would I choose? What drinks would I serve? So many questions.

Jan said...

OH DEAR!
Such clutter...nobody could get through the door!
Hmm.

Minx said...

There are only a few cushions on me bed, Jan - not too much clutter. You should see the rest of the room!

Jon M said...

Mrs Doyle would be interesting but I'd keep saying "Ah Gowan, gowan, gowan!"

Cailleach said...

David Norris - twinkly eyed Irish politician
Bob Geldof
the Hoff
that actor that played the French hard man in Ronan with Robert De Niro
Robert De Niro
while we're at it Al Pacino

hmmm, a bit of a theme going on here...

Minx said...

Why, Jon?


Cailleach, this was supposed to non-sexual. I was extolling the virtues of having a bed full of brains not brawn. I'd probably give Robert De Niro a run for his money, though.

Jan said...

I meant MY room, not yours!
YOURS looks a paragon Of Calm.

Minx said...

I knowed what you did mean, Jan, I was just bein' silly! I am a paragon of sillitude!